Getting the message across – a simple 3-step model

There are occasions when we need to get across a really important message to someone but past experience has taught us that it’s harder than it sounds.

The problem is that the harder the message, the more we find our own anxiety getting in the way.  So then we can end-up trying to cover our anxiety by talking too much, repeating ourselves, or even trying to soften the message.  This results in the other person being confused, frustrated and pretty fed-up.  So how can we ensure we are crystal clear in the way we communicate?

Follow my 3 Simple Steps and I promise you that you will get your message across – and none of the steps include a megaphone!

Imagine a large sheet of white paper with a black dot in the centre. It is highly unlikely when you look at the paper that you will miss that black dot.  Now imagine the same sheet of paper with the same black dot PLUS lots of other stuff on the paper – words, pictures, ‘noise’. Is it harder to spot the dot?

It’s the same with communication. When we communicate, particularly if we have a difficult message to get across, we can often confuse things by saying too much and this results in our message getting lost.

So if you want to get something important across to someone, think about that black dot on a sheet of white paper.  Spend a moment to drill down until you are clear what you need to say as succinctly as possible. Say it, and then give it time to ‘land’ with the other person – and use the power of silence.  Give them the time and space to hear what you’ve said and consider it.  Remain silent and allow them to be the first to speak.  So to summarise,

1. Plan it

2. Say it

3. Be silent


Let me know how you get on – I’d love to hear from you.